April 22, 2014

I’ve decided that watching Downfall is a really good idea. That should tell you where I am at emotionally right now.

April 22, 2014

I have never had a year like this. There have been maybe two or three weeks total when I wasn’t given some really terrible news. You win, 2014. I give up.

April 22, 2014
terriblerealestateagentphotos:

For a variety of reasons, this is one shower that should be checked thoroughly before use.
Follow on Twitter @BadRealtyPhotos

terriblerealestateagentphotos:

For a variety of reasons, this is one shower that should be checked thoroughly before use.

Follow on Twitter @BadRealtyPhotos

April 22, 2014
sorenbowie:

jetpackexhaust:

thisdanobrien:

hereinidaho:

cracked:

kathythewriter:

codyjohnston:

Maggie remembers the war.

This calls for a #DogsOfCracked cute-off. Briscoe says take this:


And Christina H’s pooch Frobolome enters the rumble…


This is Stormageddon “Craig” Harrison, and he likes to party. 


All you motherfuckers brought “sweet” to a Cute Fight.

That was taken after a trip to the dog park, which we take EVERY SINGLE MORNING, even when I’m hungover, which is LOTS. He plays with his dog-friends and if no one else is there, we do WIND SPRINTS to keep us both SHARP. I am Dog Mom Supreme.


Neutrino wonders at the disproportionate number of non-cats among Cracked writers’ pets. I mean we’re meant to be working on the internet.

This is my plant. I don’t know what kind it is. It gets too much sun, or not enough or something. Anyway, it’s dying, but in a cute way.

sorenbowie:

jetpackexhaust:

thisdanobrien:

hereinidaho:

cracked:

kathythewriter:

codyjohnston:

Maggie remembers the war.

This calls for a #DogsOfCracked cute-off. Briscoe says take this:

And Christina H’s pooch Frobolome enters the rumble…

This is Stormageddon “Craig” Harrison, and he likes to party. 

image

All you motherfuckers brought “sweet” to a Cute Fight.

That was taken after a trip to the dog park, which we take EVERY SINGLE MORNING, even when I’m hungover, which is LOTS. He plays with his dog-friends and if no one else is there, we do WIND SPRINTS to keep us both SHARP. I am Dog Mom Supreme.

Neutrino wonders at the disproportionate number of non-cats among Cracked writers’ pets. I mean we’re meant to be working on the internet.

This is my plant. I don’t know what kind it is. It gets too much sun, or not enough or something. Anyway, it’s dying, but in a cute way.

April 21, 2014

hereinidaho:

obsessedwiththeroyals:

George throwing a bitch to the floor

I’m gonna steal that baby.

April 21, 2014
Things I Have Learned Running a Webcomic

wordsofdiana:

1. Easter is the best holiday to write memes/jokes about because it’s a 4 day holiday so the jokes can be circulated longer, as opposed to say, Hallowe’en where you really only get one day out of them.

2. Tumblr posts do better when posted late at night.

3. Facebook posts do best at lunch time…

April 21, 2014

Anonymous asked: Hi Dan, I really liked your book and the Cracked videos you've been writing/creating lately, but I miss your Friday columns. Are you ever going to go back to being a regular Cracked columnist or are you just too busy with other projects? P.S. You are awesome.

cracked:

thisdanobrien:

Thanks for the kind words! Unfortunately, my other responsibilities at Cracked make it impossible to keep up a weekly column-writing schedule. That column was a fun little playground for me and I loved having a regular spot, but I won’t say that it was the BEST thing for my general anxiety. I miss it, but if I still had to do a weekly column on top of all other responsibilities I’m pretty sure my brain would leak out of my butt.

The BEST thing about me not having a weekly column is that we’ve been able to bring a bunch new columnists into the fold and I’m super stoked to watch them all grow and challenge themselves. There’s an energy and hunger inherent to being a new columnist (Kathy Benjamin, Cezary Jan Struciewiscz, JF Sargent, Winston Rowntree, Pauli Poisuo, C. Coville, Luis Prada and an even larger list of roving columnists like Jason Iannone and Mark Hill) that’s really exciting to me. Keep an eye on ‘em, because they’re all doing some pretty cool stuff.

P.S. YOU are awesome.

In case you’re not familiar with our new columnists/longtime kickass writers, memorize these names:

And of course you can always catch up on the works of Dam O. Brian.

April 21, 2014
cracked:

kathythewriter:

codyjohnston:

Maggie remembers the war.

This calls for a #DogsOfCracked cute-off. Briscoe says take this:


And Christina H’s pooch Frobolome enters the rumble…

cracked:

kathythewriter:

codyjohnston:

Maggie remembers the war.

This calls for a #DogsOfCracked cute-off. Briscoe says take this:

And Christina H’s pooch Frobolome enters the rumble…

April 19, 2014

Anonymous asked: Hi Dan, I really liked your book and the Cracked videos you've been writing/creating lately, but I miss your Friday columns. Are you ever going to go back to being a regular Cracked columnist or are you just too busy with other projects? P.S. You are awesome.

thisdanobrien:

Thanks for the kind words! Unfortunately, my other responsibilities at Cracked make it impossible to keep up a weekly column-writing schedule. That column was a fun little playground for me and I loved having a regular spot, but I won’t say that it was the BEST thing for my general anxiety. I miss it, but if I still had to do a weekly column on top of all other responsibilities I’m pretty sure my brain would leak out of my butt.

The BEST thing about me not having a weekly column is that we’ve been able to bring a bunch new columnists into the fold and I’m super stoked to watch them all grow and challenge themselves. There’s an energy and hunger inherent to being a new columnist (Kathy Benjamin, Cezary Jan Struciewiscz, JF Sargent, Winston Rowntree, Pauli Poisuo, C. Coville, Luis Prada and an even larger list of roving columnists like Jason Iannone and Mark Hill) that’s really exciting to me. Keep an eye on ‘em, because they’re all doing some pretty cool stuff.

P.S. YOU are awesome.

April 19, 2014

fuckyeahhistorycrushes:

DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HISTORY AND GET HELLA EMOTIONAL
BECAUSE I DO

April 19, 2014
codyjohnston:

Maggie remembers the war.

This calls for a #DogsOfCracked cute-off. Briscoe says take this:

codyjohnston:

Maggie remembers the war.

This calls for a #DogsOfCracked cute-off. Briscoe says take this:

April 19, 2014
cracked:

"[In Masters and Johnson’s sex studies], partners were matched randomly (if you still think that sounds awesome, the next time you’re in line at Burger King, imagine getting randomly matched up for sex with any one of the people around you). Oh, by the way, the subjects ranged in age from 18 to 89. … We’re not knocking the work Masters and Johnson did—it was absolutely revolutionary and totally changed the way the modern world thinks about sex. We’re just saying it wasn’t the erotic carnival of flesh the subjects probably had in mind upon entering a sex laboratory." #CrackedClassic
5 Psych Experiments That Sounded Fun (Until They Started)



I’m super proud of this article because for MONTHS everyone in Texas heard these annoying radio ads trying to recruit volunteers for the NASA study. By the time they stopped I was on the verge of insanity. Instead of collapsing in a ball and promising to let the government do whatever it wanted to me as long as I never had to hear that lady say, “I’m helping NASA!” in her over-excited, nasal voice ever again, I took my frustration and managed to get paid for it.

cracked:

"[In Masters and Johnson’s sex studies], partners were matched randomly (if you still think that sounds awesome, the next time you’re in line at Burger King, imagine getting randomly matched up for sex with any one of the people around you). Oh, by the way, the subjects ranged in age from 18 to 89. … We’re not knocking the work Masters and Johnson did—it was absolutely revolutionary and totally changed the way the modern world thinks about sex. We’re just saying it wasn’t the erotic carnival of flesh the subjects probably had in mind upon entering a sex laboratory." #CrackedClassic

5 Psych Experiments That Sounded Fun (Until They Started)

I’m super proud of this article because for MONTHS everyone in Texas heard these annoying radio ads trying to recruit volunteers for the NASA study. By the time they stopped I was on the verge of insanity. Instead of collapsing in a ball and promising to let the government do whatever it wanted to me as long as I never had to hear that lady say, “I’m helping NASA!” in her over-excited, nasal voice ever again, I took my frustration and managed to get paid for it.

April 18, 2014
"The Duchess of Cambridge is expected to change into flat shoes for her visit to Manly beach."

(via britishroyals)

Journalism at its finest.

April 17, 2014
cracked:

[Maxwell on Tumblr]

cracked:

[Maxwell on Tumblr]

April 16, 2014

shelbysbutt:

gabydunn:

#kingbaby

omg

(Source: obsessedwiththeroyals)

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